Things That Keep Me Up at Night

Alan Levine

Are bones wet? 

I know that is a weird question to ask. I have Googled it many times and the answer is always no, but they ARE slightly moist. Another creepy fact is that bones have blood vessels and they bleed when they get broken. My personal theory is that bones are wet and as we get older the wetness slowly wears down the bones so they get weaker. 

Would it hurt if bones touched muscle?

What keeps bones from touching the muscles surrounding them? Do bones touch the muscles and we don’t know about it? Would it hurt if the bones in a human body touched the bare muscle? These questions make me want to test out the question, but I have no idea how I would test it. I don’t think anyone would be willing to go to the doctor and have them surgically touch the muscles to the bones. 

What happens if a serial killer breaks into my house? 

If it’s the middle of the night then who would be alerted if my family is about to die? Where would I hide and how long could I hide before I got caught? I could hide under the bed but that’s cliche. I also don’t have a closet so that option is out. I  think I would probably get caught quickly. 

What came first, the chicken or the egg? 

If you believe in God like I do, yeah the chick who wears black on a daily believes in a higher power, then your opinion on this overused question might be the chicken. My theory is that God made the chicken and made them lay eggs. If you don’t believe in God, then you might just be chasing that question around and around.